Satirical Views of Filipino Bloggers

Senator Cesar Montano

2007-02-16T03:26:00.001-08:00

CESAR MONTANO
THE QUINTESSENTIAL HANFORD MALE

Cesar Montano knows that no one can tell a lot about a man from the type of underwear he uses. A Hanford Classic user, Cesar relies on the quality of Hanford underwear.

Similar to Hanford's continuing excellence in the undergarment industry, Cesar's staying power as a highly acclaimed actor is undisputed-he's been in the business for a long time and his star shows no signs of fading. He intends to take more active roles in the movies he is involved in. Cesar starred in Bagong Buwan, a film directed by Marilaou-Diaz Abaya under Star Cinema Productions where in he won a Best Actor Trophy last Metro Manila Film Festival.

He also produced and directed his own movie and this was Mananabas. And as if that weren't enough, Cesar starred in a weekly television sitcom, Kaya ni Mister, Kaya ni Misis, with Maricel Soriano. He even also had his own solo album. At present Cesar is in Australia filming a Hollywood movie.

But that doesn't mean that work is all there is to Cesar Montano. He is also a painter and he indulges in it as often as he can, usually after a long day's work. Perhaps his wife Sunshine and his little angel, are his inspiration.

Taken from www.hanford.com.ph

I am Cesar Montano and I'm running in the Philippine Senate.

Taxes, taxes, oh my!

2007-02-15T17:09:00.000-08:00

I think income tax returns during election season ought to provide us with more reason to vote wisely. My jaw just about fell to the ground seeing the summary of my taxes paid this year: what the hell?!

I've worked for five years in the private sector, having stayed with the Single, No Dependent tax bracket - so in essence I've got the biggest hit for taxes of everyone. I pay my bills on time, keep a good credit history, go to work, come home. When I go out with friends, I pay my VAT, the service charge. I tip good service in establishments. Having been given a chance to work abroad like many, I opted not to contribute to the Philippine Brain Drain by staying here in Manila.

Every year I get my ITR, and cringe at the amount of money I'm taxed for: that could've been the downpayment for a new car, or that much could've paid for my brother's tuition, or an MBA for myself. But no, those went to roads that aren't paved, streetlights that don't work, inefficient public servants, red tape in government offices, subsidized tuition for state colleges (where the students rally against government) and junket trips for government employees.

My taxes go to the pork barrel of public officials, where they drive around in their shiny fleet cars, their own personal security detail. Their children go to school in posh universities (maybe even some who go to the state colleges?). They live in villages where there is no traffic, no squatters, and no potholes in the streets. They have a security detail that drives ahead of them and stops traffic. Our public officials are so far removed from reality that it's laughable to hear them debate about integrity, honesty and 'knowing the pulse of the people'.

We see them on TV acting like brats (the recent Ethics committee with Cayetano for one). We hear them on the radio and they can't even piece together a decent sentence. They have poor comprehension skills and can't answer news reporters properly. And, during elections, they jump ship and join where the money is. They join political parties not because of the party platform but because the money is there. Which is why you get strange bedfellows like the Estradas and the Rocos, and Tito Sotto and Tessie Oreta with the Administration candidates. Villar with Erap.

So, you have that, and on another side you also get the celebrity candidates with delusions of grandeur. Philippine politics is tragic enough with the the children, nieces, nephews and grandchildren of old politicos (new family business!). Now we have a new kind of political dynasty: the celebrity-politician.

Which brings me back to being frustrated about my taxes.

I don't mind paying my dues. I am proud to be a Filipino, and I don't intend to leave the country to work elsewhere. So somewhere out there, my taxes are being used to pay for honest government workers. They're being used to pay for public school teachers, policemen, soldiers. But I am seriously having doubts that my taxes are going to the right places and the right people. What with the choices being actors with zero public service experience, boxing champions and has-been singers. The other set are pampered children of older politicians, who've never worked a real job in their entire lives (except maybe to be Daddy's coffee go-girl).

For Pete's sake, where are you, smart voters??! It's our hard work - the silent middle class - that gets this country's economy moving. But it's our apathy and non-participation that gets idiots elected because we don't show up to vote. We don't volunteer. We don't give our two cents' worth in issues that really matter. We must represent this time.

Champ Gets Into Political Ring

2007-02-14T01:03:00.000-08:00

"Some candidates may be smart but have accomplished nothing. What the people need is not their intelligence but their service to the poor."

OHMYGOD.

And how the hell will you do that in Congress, Pacman? Apparently, Pacman wants to have a vote in Congress. He wants to represent his people when there's a votation to be made. WTF?!?? He himself admitted that he knows absolutely NOTHING about making bills, laws etc., let alone passing them. On an interview Pacman said that there are a lot of good lawyers out there who can make these bills and he will be there to approve what suits his people. Wake up Manny. You're supposed to take a proactive role in Congress, create bills FOR YOUR PEOPLE and not just sit there waiting for whatever you think will suit them.

Congress is the supreme legislative body of the friggin nation. A congressman is a LEGISLATOR, and NOT just simply a voter.

Exerpts taken from The Job of a Congressman by Lee Hamilton

First, to be an effective legislator, a congressman must study and seek advice on a mind-boggling array of issues.

STUDY and SEEK ADVISE on Issues. Pacman, you have a responsibility to understand complicated issues and deal with them. You won't be handed a script, you have to think for yourself. Geez, good luck with that.

Second, a congressman is expected to be an advocate - for individuals, groups and communities in his/her district, from assisting someone with their social security disability claim to helping a community obtain funding for a new road or bridge.

Okay, fine.. Pacman can be an advocate for his people but I doubt he knows how this can be done. It isn't simply a matter of standing, talking, and voting. You have to lobby for your cause. You can't just box out people like you do in the ring.

Third, a congressman is also an educator and a communicator, translating the work of Congress and the complexities of modern issues to constituents, and listening to them.

Translating the work of Congress and educating your constituents on issues? You have to understand them first before you can do that.

Fourth, a congressman must perform the ceremonial function, serving the dual role of "ambassador" from the nation's capital and local dignitary.

We all know that Pacman has brought the nation closer with his International wins. Pacman gave the country pride and proved to everyone that Filipinos can win in the international boxing arena. Congress is a different matter altogether. In Congress, Pacman will be expected to be the legislative representative of the province of South Cotobato. Sure, we all tuned in during Pacman's fight and we cheered him on as he sent his opponents down to their knees. Being in Congress is NOT about fame, fortune, or about bringing out warm and fuzzy feelings. Pacman, PLEASE stick to what you do best, BEAT those international bastards and show them what a Filipino sportsman can do.

Finally, the most effective congressmen also act as consensus builders. Whether it is in congressional committees drafting legislation or in town meetings back home, the role of a Member of Congress is to provide political leadership to reconcile differing points of view and to bring about progress when the debate has gone on long enough.

You are to provide political leadership to bring about progess and NOT offer boxing skills that will bring out pride in Filipino sportsmanship.

It doesn't follow that since you made a lot of money and was able to give away jeeps, tricycles and what-have-you's last year that you can run for a position in Congress. All it means is that you have a big heart. I suggest you open up the Manny Pacquiao Foundation - sponsor athletes or open up a youth center. Pacman, you are in the wrong ring. Get out before you embarrass yourself and your people.

Send In The Clowns

2007-02-12T23:30:00.000-08:00

Inquirer is right, the carnivale is back in town indeed. At the stroke of midnight it all became final. Richard Gomez and Victor Wood are running for the Senate, Boxing Champ Manny Pacquiao is running for Congress, and a whole lot of monkeys are running for god knows what.

Bunye issued a statement today, "We want a nurturing campaign, not a contest of mudslinging or muckraking."

Mudslinging and muckraking? Well, you can leave that up to us.